


The Music of Our Love

by marihy



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, M/M, No happy endings, Pianist Yuuri, Violinist Victor, idk how else to tag this, no happiness at all, only sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 14:56:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9497063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marihy/pseuds/marihy
Summary: One could say the music of their love was like a waltz, a dance of love.It was a song of glittering, vibrant crescendos and gentle, loving diminuendos. It was a song of fiery, explosive passion and tender, soft intimacy. It was a song of emotion and power and longing and desperation and hoping and everything in between.And it was a song doomed to end in a disappointing off-key flat.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I have major writers block so I'm writing this instead of finishing anything. I hope you like this!

Victor always told him music gave one a reason for life.

He said that music was sight without sight, that music was one's character poured onto a page, that music was pure emotion, that music was the only true way of expressing one's love.  Of being able to pour your heart, your soul, and your life into something.

Yuri has never been a fan of pouring out his feelings, so music has never attracted him.

But Victor must be doing something right if he is a world-famous violinist.

And if music is like love, if music is pouring your heart and soul out, if music is investing your life and becoming something bigger than yourself, if music is throwing away everything and yet somehow also gaining everything, than the love between Victor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki must be music of the most beautiful kind.

"Pianos and violins are made to play together," Victor would always say as he wrapped his arms around Yuuri's blushing figure, his eyes clouded with adoration.

And one would definitely agree after hearing the two play together.

And there was no doubt that they loved each other.  There was no doubt.  One could see it in they way Yuuri smiled at Victor, as if he were an angel, or in the way Victor touched Yuuri, as if there were no thing more precious than him.

And so one could say the music of their love was like a waltz, a dance of love.

It was a song of glittering, vibrant crescendos and gentle, loving diminuendos. It was a song of fiery, explosive passion and tender, soft intimacy. It was a song of emotion and power and longing and desperation and hoping and everything in between.

And it was a song doomed to end in a disappointing off-key flat.

Yuri had sensed something was off when he'd arrived at Victor and Yuuri's apartment complex.

Maybe it was the lack of classical music playing that tipped him off.  Victor and Yuuri's apartment was always bursting with violins and trumpets and pianos and flutes and the like, whether they were watching a movie or listening to music or playing it themselves.

Yuri had never arrived to a quiet apartment.

Or maybe it was the moving truck loading a grand piano and a carton of boxes filled with what looked suspiciously like Yuuri's fine china.

Or maybe it was just the atmosphere, the presence of the air, the deathly stillness, the emptiness about the area.

Either way, Yuri crept with trepidation up the stairwell.

When he reached the door, Yuri found himself hesitating to knock.

It would be fine, he told himself.  He'd knock on the door, and Katsuki would answer, and he'd smile like he always did, and Victor would come and wrap his arms around Yuuri's waist and smile, and they'd be so so in love and it would be alright.

Yuri knocked.

No answer.

He waited.  Everything was okay, he said to himself.  They were probably making out or something.  They're disgusting like that.  They're in love.  They're so so in love.

Then Yuri hears a sniffle and a sob.  A jolt strikes his heart, and his blood freezes in his veins.

He jiggles the door knob impatiently, finding it is unlocked.

He swings the door open with a crash only to find that Yuuri and Victor are not making out, they're not sitting on the couch laughing with each other, they're not twirling each other through the kitchen in their pathetic attempts to dance, they're not giggling in the bedroom.

What he does find is Victor, curled up on the floor with his knuckles bleeding, surrounded with broken framed pictures.  They're all of Yuuri.

Yuri's breath catches.

When he tries to speak his throat is dry.

"V-Victor," he manages to eke out, "What happened here?"

"Yuuri is gone," Victor lifts his heads, his eyes downcast and downtrodden, "He is gone."

Yuri feels as if a bolt of lightning has struck him in the head.

"Wh-What?"

"He is gone, and he is not coming back," Victor chokes out, his voice garbled with tears and melancholy flatness.

"Wh-" Yuri spits, refusing to believe what is right in front of his eyes, "Why?  What happened?"

Instead of responding, Victor pushes himself off the ground.

"Come.  We are going to the concert hall."

"Victor?" Yuri asks, his voice small.

"Let's go," Victor says, refusing to meet Yuri's eyes.

And Yuri has no choice but to follow.

The drive to the concert hall is silent, the only noise being the cars zipping by them on the highway, and the sound of Victor's occasional sniffles.

Yuri looks over at Victor nervously.

His eyes are shakily set, like a weakening dam just about to burst.  His bleeding knuckles are clenched so tight around the steering wheel that the skin is white.

Yuri cannot bring himself to keep looking.

Instead he ponders what Victor has said, trying to let the words sink in because they are so unbelievable, so completely unbelievable, that Yuri finds himself unable to register them in his mind.

_Yuuri is gone._

Yuuri is gone.

Why is Yuuri gone?  Why did Yuuri leave?  What happened?  Yuuri loves Victor.

Or at least, Yuri thought he did.

And now, where is he?  What could have possessed him to leave?  Why would he leave?  Why would Yuuri Katsuki, the man who looked at Victor like he was an angel, like he was the whole world, leave?

What happened?

The harsh squeal of the brakes startled Yuuri back into the present.  They've arrived at the concert hall.  It feels weird coming here without Yuuri.

They typically have unrestricted access to the concert hall.  It is where Yuuri and Victor practice together.

Or used to practice together.

Victor gets out of the car wordlessly, and Yuri follows.

Once inside, Yuri dares to speak.

"Victor-"

"I have to unpack my violin," Victor says, his tone flat.  His eyes refuse to meet Yuri's but the dam in them is straining to break.

Yuri waits until he has taken the violin out before trying again.

"Victor,"

"I have to practice," Victor whispers, struggling to keep his voice steady.  The dam is cracking, chipping away.  He walks up onto the stage and sets up his music.  Yuri sits uneasily on the stage next to him.

He raises his bow to the strings and starts to play.  Only a phrase in, his fingers slip.

"Victor-" Yuri starts again.

"I got it," Victor cuts him off, "I'm just a little rusty."

You came here yesterday, Yuri wants to scream.  You came with him.

Victor tries to keep playing.  His bow slips this time.

Yuri opens his mouth.

"I got it," Victor says before Yuri can say anything, "I got it."

He starts again.  He plays the wrong note.  

"Victor-" Yuri starts.  

"I got it." His fingers fall again.  

"Victor, please-"

"It's okay, I can do this." 

His bow falls again, a sharp grating note sounding through the empty hall.  

"Victor, stop-"

"I got this!"

"Victor, please, just put the violin down."

He misses another note.

"Yuri, I can do this!"

"Victor, please, let's go back."

"Stop it!"

The dam is wearing away, water leaking through the cracks.

"Put the violin down,"

"Just give me a second!"

His bow falls again, hitting an abrasive chord.

"Victor, put the violin down!"

"Give me a second, Yuri!"

His fingers are flying everywhere now, desperate to hit the right notes yet never reaching their goal.  His bow falls time and time again, the noise harsh.

"Victor-"

"Wait-"

"Victor-"

"Wait!"

"Victor!"

"WAIT!"

The E-string snaps.

"GODDAMNIT!" Victor screams, and the dam breaks.

Victor slumps to the ground, his eyes overflowing with tears and his chest heaving with sobs, and wails.

Yuri kneels down next to him, unsure of what to do.  He's never been faced with this sort of thing.  Victor has always been the one to help  _Yuri_ when he needed it, and this is foreign to him.

"Victor, its okay," he says, putting a hand on Victor's shoulder, "we can get a new string."

"No," Victor says, his voice thick with sorrow, "No, we can't.  We could never replace it.  I could never replace it.  I could never replace him."

Yuri stares at Victor.  Victor, who is coming apart before his eyes.  Victor, whose eyes are spilling oceans of regret and woe.  Victor, who he wants to help but doesn't know how.

"Victor, put the violin down," Yuri says softly, "Let's go home."

Victor sets the instrument down on the stage, unable to form any words.

"Let's go home," Yuri says again, helping a shaky Victor to his feet.

"Okay," Victor manages to say, "It sounds lousy without the piano anyway."

And so they leave, the violin still sitting alone and broken on the stage.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Please leave a comment if you can!


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